What to do with my Anger?

How do we find a balance when we are feeling unheard, disrespected, devalued and even demeaned?

Is it ever appropriate or healthy to just be angry and loud and big?

Anger is a tricky emotion.  It can be one completely fueled by our Ego to cover up our fear and vulnerability.

When Anger is Ego-based and acting as a defense mechanism, it puffs us up.  It intimidates others.  It gives us a sense of power when we are feeling most powerless.

This type of Anger usually is not productive, or healing, or connecting.  Mostly, this kind of Anger serves to give us the illusion that we are not as small as we feel.  In fact, often the level of Anger being expressed can be directly proportionate to how small and vulnerable one actually feels (unconsciously or not).  And it separates us from one another and from our connection to our Higher Selves.

On the other hand, Anger can also be fed by Essence. 

  • When we have been wronged;
  • when there has been an injustice;
  • when there is an imbalance of power that is exploited by those at the top;
  • when the disadvantaged are taken advantage of;
  • when the uneducated are disempowered because of their circumstances;
  • when innocents are victims of deadly force;
  • when the impoverished are blamed for their poverty;
  • when valuable resources are squandered;
  • when the liberties of the majority are dismissed for the entitlement of a few;
  • when basic human rights are denied because of race, religion, gender, sexual orientation…

If we are connected to Essence, then we know that we are also connected to every human being on the planet – so in these situations, we feel indignant in the face of these unfair, biased, and degrading behaviors…We are all connected, so we are all affected.

According to dictionary.com, Indignation is defined as a feeling, characterized by, or expressing strong displeasure at something considered unjust, offensive, insulting, or base.

Indignation is a type of Anger that can actually lead us in the direction of further Authenticity. This kind of Anger need not be aggressive or violent or abusive; in fact, if it is channeled through the lens of Essence, it can empower us to assert our Truth and take Action that is completely Essence motivated. 

It can connect us, rather than separate us.

Today, maybe in response to feeling indignant about these injustices, you are gathering in large numbers to rally and march in solidarity with women across the country to honor the Truths and Values that you believe in;

Or it could be that the unfairness of sexism, racism, homophobia, or xenophobia has riled you up enough over the years that you now speak up regularly and loudly when you see evidence of these types of institutionalized prejudices in your daily life;

Or perhaps, you have released an Old Story that in the past had you convinced that you must stay small, never speak up, and hide the Truth of Who You Are in order to stay safe.  And now, having found your voice, are raising the volume of it to make sure you are heard by telling people “no,” expressing what you want in no uncertain terms, growing big where you used to be small…

Today, let us differentiate between the feeling of an Ego-based, fear-fueled, Anger that keeps us limited and restrained within the illusion of power; which harms not just ourselves, but ripples across generations and actually perpetuates the fear it seeks to avoid;

And instead, tap into to a feeling of Essence-based, love-fueled, Indignation that inspires us to take Action that might actually impact our surroundings, our circumstances, our lives, for the betterment of us all.

Connection.  Not Separation.

“‘No’ with deepest conviction is better than ‘Yes’ to avoid trouble”  ~ Mahatma Ghandi


I am brilliant;

I am magnificent;

I am a being of Love and Light.

I am here to bring my Essence Self to every experience of my Life.

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Coming soon –  Relationship Bootcamp: 12 Weeks to a More Essence-Centered Life.